5.25.2011

No wasted sorrows

There are 8 graduations at Shelterwood this week. EIGHT! Whew. God is doing amazing things at this place. Have I told you how much I love it? Basically, they'll have to wheel me out of there. I mean, I am in. I'M. IN. I believe God has positioned me at this place at this time for a reason. I don't know that my faith has ever been stronger. I also don't know if the challenges have ever been greater. It's exhausting work. Mentally. Emotionally. Physically, at times. And day after day I can't wait to go to work.

So, back to the graduations. For those that don't know, Shelterwood is a Christian Therapeutic Boarding School. Kids don't just stay there for a few months. They are there for at least 8 months. At least. That's a long time and a LOT of work happens during that time. You (they) can make surface changes in a few months. You know, the "slap a bandaid on the problem and it will go away" kind of fix. Yea, that doesn't really work for the long term. We call those first-order changes in my world. Those happen all the time in life. Even in my life.

I'm talkin' about real big, life-altering, generation-changing, change. Second-order change. The best kind of all change. The kind that digs below the surface. Below the baggage. Below the stuff (or poop as one of my girls and I refer to it). That kind. God change. During one of the parent's speeches she said, "God doesn't waste our sorrows." I.LOVE.THAT. I'm bringing that with me, tucking it in my pocket, and marinating in it like a big fat Kansas beef steak. MAR-I-NA-TING. SOAKIN' IT IN, BABY! I just left that graduation and have probably repeated it about, oh, a thousand times in my head already. I had to share.

Say it again.

GOD DOESN'T WASTE OUR SORROWS.

All the crap that the world offers, all the struggles in our lives, all the heart ache. They are for a purpose. I know, like many, I can quote Jeremiah 29:11. God has plans for us, plans for hope, a future, not to harm us. I believe that. It's my favorite verse. But to be reminded that God doesn't waste the crap that we experience is kind of life altering for me. I kind of feel like, well, like I have graduated. Like I'm going to close one chapter of my life and move on. Moving away from friends I've had for almost a decade has been hard to say the least. I have felt lost without them. I have been sorrowful at times. Guess what I'm going to say next. Yep. God doesn't waste our sorrows.

I'm not really sure what else to say. I guess I'm ready to let some of the past go. Some of the crap that I've held onto. The mistakes I've made. God is using them right now. I don't have to be held captive to mistakes I've made or that others have made against me. I am free and it feels good, baby!

3 comments:

Mendy said...

i totally know what you mean about being mentally, emotionally, physically drained but still loving your job...isn't that great? it's such a confirmation that you're in the right place. i love the idea of "no wasted sorrows." what a great message to pass along to your shelterwood kids. by the way, i need to do lots of picking-of-Meesh's-brain this summer to enlist your help with my students. so get ready for brain-picking!

Michelle said...

I'll be prepared!

Erika said...

I love that saying too! And I'm so happy you are enjoying your job, that is a true gift! You crack me up just reading this and I am excited to see you in a few days!!!! I will NOT be wearing skinny jeans. :)